"If you give extra kisses, you get bigger hugs!"

"What I really want to do with my life, what I want to do for a living..is be with your daughter. I'm good at it."

"I loved a girl once." Pause. "Shut up man, you're bringing me down!"

"I'm looking for something bigger. I'm looking for a dare to be great situation."

"What I really want to do with my life, what I want to do for a living..is be with your daughter. I'm good at it."

Lloyde to his sister who just yelled at him "Get in a good mood, how hard it just to decide to be in a good mood and then be in a good mood." Sister."Gee, It's easy."

"Maybe you've got the right idea, Cory. If you start out depressed, everything is kind of a pleasant surprise."

i gave her my heart // she gave me a pen =[

"Every year I throw this party, and every year no one helps me clean up...Why am I yelling?"

I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen

Guy at party: "How'd you get Diane Court to go out with you? What are you?" Lloyd: "I'm Lloyd Dobbler."

You start out depressed, everything turns out to be a pleasant surprise.

"Lloyd, we just don't want to see you get hurt." "I WANNA GET HURT!!"

"bitches man.. bitches"- little boy chillin with Lloyd's friends when they're trying to cheer him up

"I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen." "Kickboxing. Sport of the future."

"Hey my brother can i borrow some of your Hey Soul Classics? "No, my brother you have to go get your own"

"if you guys know so much about women how come you here at like a gas an sip on a saturday night completly alone drinking beers with no women anywhere"

I don't wanna sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't wanna sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or...process anything sold, bought...or processed, or repair anything sold bought or processed, ya know, as a career, I don't wanna do that. So uh, my father's in the army...he wants me to join...but I can't work for that corporation. Umm, so, what I've been doing lately is kickboxing.
Don't be a guy, the world is full of guys, be a man
"Dissed in the Malibu!"
"Oh, yeah. If you guys know so much about women why are you at the Gas'n'Sip on a Friday night with no women?"
"It's a choice, man."

"I'm a good person, but you are a *great* person." ~Corey to Lloyd "You invade my soul." ~Corey to Joe "Joe lies." ~Corey

At the dinnertable Lloyd responds to the question: "What are your plans?" "Well, I've given this a lot of thought, and I don't want to buy anything, sell anything or process anything for a living. I don't want to buy anything sold or processed, or sell anything bought or processed, or process anything bought or sold or processed. . . Or repair anything bought or sold or processed. I don't want to do that for a living."

She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart, and she gave me a pen.

I'm Tony Mantana all I got in this world is my balls, and my word and I don't break them for no one

"Why dont you try sticking your head up your a**s, see if it fits"

I'm Tony Montana you fuck with me, your fucking with the best.

"Say hello to my little friend..."

"SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FREIND!!!!!!!!!!"

"You think I got this scar eatin p**sy?"

wattaya lookin at? your all a bunch of f*** a* holes u know y? caz u dont have the guts 2 be wat u wanna be u need ppl like me so u can pt ur fu** fingers n say dats the bad guy so wat dat make u? good? ur not good u just know how to hide howda lie me i dont have that problem me i always tell the truth even when i lie so say goodnight to the bad guy come on the last time u gonna c a bad guy like dis let me tell ya com on make way 4 da bad guy theres a bad guy comin through u betta get outta his way (tony montana)

We Got The Best Lawyers In Miami

tony: look at this. look at her. A junkie. I got a f**kin junkie for a wife. sleeps all day with them black shades on. wakes up with a kwelood and who won't f**k me cause she's in a coma. i can't even have a kid with her man. her womb is so polluted i can't even have a f**kin little baby with her.

Immigration Officer: Where'd you get the beauty scar, tough guy, eatin' pu**y? Tony Montana: How'm I gonna get a scar like that eating pu**y?

Alex: They found what was under the car tony. Now they have security up the a** and the heat is gonna come down hard on my partners and me. There isn't gonna be a next time you f**king dumb c**ksucker. Tony: Hey hey hey take it easy the way you talk to me ok. Alex: I told you a long time ago you f**king little monkey not to f**k me!!! Tony: HEY HEY WHO THE F**K YOU THINK YOUR TALKING TO HUH. YOU WANNA F**K WITH ME!? WHO DO YOU THINK I AM YOUR F**KING BELL BOY. YOU WANNA GO TO WAR YOU WANNA GO TO WAR WE TAKE YOU TO WAR OK?

"You know what capitalism is? Getting f*cked!"

After sex] Brantley Foster: Can I make a personal observation? Vera Prescott: Um, anything but the thighs. Brantley Foster: You know, somebody sold you a bill of goods and convinced you you had to be 21 forever. I think you're terrific; I think the only thing wrong with you is your husband is a jerk. You're beautiful, you're intelligent, you're sensuous... Vera Prescott: Say that again! Brantley Foster: Which part? Vera Prescott: All of it! [sounds of car] Vera Prescott: Oh, no. Brantley Foster: What, what is it? Vera Prescott: It's the jerk. [Brantley rushes to the window] Vera Prescott: My husband. Brantley Foster: My uncle! Vera Prescott: Your what?! Brantley Foster: Oh God, that makes you... Vera Prescott: Auntie Vera?! Brantley Foster: Oh! God! [Vera laughs] Brantley Foster: Oh God, oh God, oh God! What's my mother going to say? I've disgraced my whole family! Vera Prescott: Oh, the hell you did!

Police Detective: "Was there or wasn't there a woman present?" Dave: "Are you serious? Fuzzy Wuzzy was a woman?"

"You want me to to go all the way up there-- to a Yankee school-- just so I can come over on the weekends and practive free love with you?"

"Y'alls the horniest bunch of white folks I've ever seen!!"

"Others may cheapen themselves. You, Milena, are a flower of the south."

"You don't know me, you don't love me, you sure as all damn don't want to marry me so why don't you leave me the hell alone?"
"I don't think I can"

"Ya'll is the hornest white folks I ever seen"

Mary:"Andrew! Leave little Truetie alone!" Bob:"What wrong, Mary?" Mary: "Your son and his dog are molesting my poodle. Andrew! Andrew, put that stick down."(He throws it over the edge) Mary:"AHHHHHHHHHHH!!" (Mary faints.)

Kevin: "Marriage was created for people who were able to make it to 25 without being eaten by dinosaurs, marriage is obsolete" Alec: "Dinosaurs are obsolete, marriage is still around."

Hey lazerlips! Your mama was a snowblower!

"I am thinking she is a virgin, or at least she used to be!"

Newton Crosby: "Where are you from, anyway?" Ben Jabituya: "Bakersfield, Originally" Newton Crosby: "No, I mean your ancestors" Ben Jabituya: "Oh Them, Pittsburgh."

"Number 5 is alive"

Goodbye goofy woman! I have enjoyed throwing you to the ground repeatedly.

I can't belive I just gave my panies to a geek.

"dont be a smartass" "okay, i'll be a dumbass"

"I can't believe my grandmother felt me up!"

Sam:When You've got nothing, you have nothing to lose

"I can't believe I just gave my panties to the Geek!"

"I can't believe it. They f**kin' forgot my birthday!!"

"Geek, can I be honest with you?" "Not if you're gonna insult me."

Scene outside church: Samantha looks up to see Jake waiting by his car. He waves to her and she looks around confused... Samantha: Who, me? Jake: Yeah you. Jake walks over to her... Samantha: Hi. Jake: Hi. Samantha: Hi. A short pause... Samantha: So what are you doing here? Jake: I heard you were here. Samantha: You came here for me? Jake: Is that okay? Samantha: Yeah, that's okay. Jake: So do you have to go to the reception? Samantha: I'm supposed to... Jake: Oh. Can I call you later? Samantha: Sure. I mean no. Jake: No I can't call you later? Samantha: Yes. No, I mean I'm not going to the reception. Jake: Oh. Great. They both walk to Jake's car. Samantha waves to her father and mouths 'This is the boy!' The scene cuts to Jake's house where Samantha and him are sitting on the dining table. A lit cake is centered between them and the lights are dim... Samantha: Thanks for getting my undies back. Jake: Thanks for coming over. Samantha: Thanks for coming to get me. Jake: Happy Birthday Samantha. Make a wish. Samantha: It already came true. Jake and Samantha lean in and (sigh) kiss!

"Alright,...I knew you'd come around."

"Grandpa Fred was in there for a half an hour. It's totally polluted.....They never listen".

"She's totally serious, asswipe!"

Long Duck Dong: "No more yankee my wankee! The Donger need FOOD!"

"I love spending time with de grandma and da grandpa and pushing lawn mowing machine so grandfathers hyena don't act up"

Long Duck Dong: "What's a-happenin', Hot Stuff?"

"She got married." "Married?" "Married." "Married?" "Yah, Married. Jeez."

" No more yanky my wanky" -long duck dong

Samantha: "You know, I just felt how much you really like me."
Geek: "You must be zoning in on my brainwaves or something."
Samantha: "No, I felt it on my leg."

"That's why they call them crushes, if they were easy they would be called something else."

Samantha: "Who, me?" Jake: "Yeah, you."

they f%$#ing forgot my birthday!

"Grandparents forgetting a birthday? They live for that shit!" "Will you stop feeling sorry for yourself? It's BAD FOR YOUR COMPLEXION!!" "NOW WE'RE BOTH ON THE PILL!" "Sorry,I don't do that kind of stuff"..."Yes you do!"..."I know!" "Who would marry her?"..."Mr.T!" "I've never bagged a babe" "Better that female extra-terrestrials?!" "How can you tell that they're female?" "They've got tits!" "Yeah but what makes them different than regular tits?" "They've got four of them!" "Hello? I dunno let me look: Mr.Ryan, are you in here?!" "She's perfect, practically impossible to cut up!"..."I swear she must have flunked about 9 grades"

uh...can i borrow your underpants for ten minutes?

While on the bus on the way home from school, Geek (Ted) says, "So you got a boyfriend?" Samanthas reply, "Yes, three big ones and they lust wimp blood, so quite bugging me or I'll sick 'em all over your weeny ass."

dong,where is my automobile?

1. "She only eats carrots to increase the size of her breasts" 2. "Just answer me one question...." "Yes, you're a total fag!" (Sam) "That wasn't the question. Am I turning you on?"

Long Duck Dong: What's a happenin' hot stuff? Long Duck Dong: No more yankie my wankie Sam: Donger's here for five hours, and he's got somebody. I live here my whole life, and I'm like a disease Jake: Would it be possible for you to tell me if there is a Samantha Baker there and if so Sir may I converse wtih her briefly? Grandma: Now you listen to me, Mister. God did not put me on this Earth to be awakened by filthy suggestions from a foul-mouthed hooligan like you. And as gor our Granddaughter, I am sure she has more than enough sense to steer clear of the likes of you. Now good night and good bye! Long Duck Dong: Ooohh Sexy Girlfriend! Grandpa Fred: Dong where is my automobile? Dong: Automobiiillleee? HAHA Jake: Let me in Dong: No way, jose. You beat me up last night Jake: You grabbed my nuts at the party Dong: That you? Jake: Yeah that me

Sam is filling out a quiz during independent study: Q "Have you ever done it?" Sam "I don't think so"
I can't believe my Grandmother actually felt me up!
"He's wearing a red argile sweater, brown pants and red shoes...no he's not retarded!"
Jake: "Did she come here with you?"
Farmer Ted: "No but if its alright with my dad she's coming home with me."
"Unbelievable..you make someone a bridesmaid and they shit all over you".
"What are you bitchin about? I gotta sleep underneath a guy named after a duck's dork."

sam: "i can't believe it. they f*ckin' forgot my birthday!"

What's a happenen hot stuff?

Geek: Can you answer me one question? Samantha: Yes, you're a total FAG. Geek: (laughs) That wasn't the question...

"There are lots of good kid, Uncle John. We just have to get rid of the bad!"

"What we're dealin' with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law." - Buford T. Justice

"There is no way you are from my loins." - Buford T. Justice "When I get home, I'm gonna punch your Momma in the mouth." - Buford T.Justice

Justice: "Junior, why didn't you have your gun loaded?"
Junior: "When I put bullets in it, Daddy, it gets too heavy."

"You look good wearing my future."

"Don't mistake paradise for a pair of legs." -Watts

"Break his heart, I'll break your face" -Watts

Keith "You always hurt the ones you love"
Watts "So when are you beating the shit out of Amanada Jones"
Keith "I'm sorry, I didn't know"
Watts "Ya well you're stupid, I alway knew you were stupid"
"The only things I care about are me, my drums, and you."
Watts: "My grandmother told me when I grew up, I'd have big boobs"
Keith": "So what happened?"

This is what my girlfriend would look like without skin

"You look good wearing my future."

Keith: "You can't judge a book by it's cover." Watts: "Yeah, but you can tell how much it's gonna cost."

"What's happenin' brother? Get down, get down! Lookin' good momma, lookin' good! Well I got's to be going now!"

Lone Star: "On my ship you will refer to me as idiot, not you, Captain."

It's Mega Maid! Shes gone from suck to blow!!

Ape #1: "What's that thing coming out of her nose?
Ape #2: "Spaceballs?!"
Ape #1: "Oh, shit, there goes the planet."

Dink dink dink dink dink dink!

Dark Helmet: Very impressive Lone Star; too bad this isn't the wild wolrd of Sports.

"Damnit. Even in the future nothing works."

"yogurt. i hate yogurt. especially with strawberries" "comb the deserts. man we aint found shit."

"You idiots!! You captured their stunt doubles" -Computer voice :"10, 9, 8, 6.." "Hey, what happened to 7??" -Computer "Just Kidding...7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Have a nice day!"

"Careful you idiot, I said across his nose, not up it! -- Who made that man a gunner?" "I did sir, he's my cousin" "Who's he?" "He's an Asshole, sir" "I know that. What's his name?" "That is his name. Asshole, Major Asshole." "And his cousin?" "He's an asshole, too, sir. Gunner's mate, first-class, Philip Asshole" "How many Assholes we got on this ship anyway?" "YO!" "I knew it. I'm surrounded by Assholes" "Keep firing, Assholes!" .. begin the whining ..

The dog thing talking to the Princess: "I'm barf." The robot maid: "What'd you say?" Dog thing: "I'm barf!"

Thank you for pressing the self-destruct button. The ship will self-destruct in three minutes.

Dark Helmet: "I'm surrounded by assholes!"

I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.

Priest: "What is your name?" MOG: "BARF!" Priest: "Your full name." MOG: "BARF-ALOMEW!"

"I'm a mog. Half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend."
[Dark Helmet playing with his Spaceballs dolls.] "Kiss me, Princess!" "No! Oh, I hate you I hate you I hate you!" "Kiss me!!" "Noooo, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh... oh... your helmet is so BIG..."
"I'll have the cleavage... uh, I mean, the salad!"
"It's the radar. It appears to be... jammed!"
[Dark Helmet tastes it] "Raspberry! There's only one man who would DARE give me the raspberry...! Loooone Staaaar!"
"I see your Schwartz is as big as mine."
"I can't BREATHE in this thing!"
"What's the matter, Colonel Sanders... CHICKEN??"
Dark Helmet: "Prepare to say goodbye to your two best friends, and I'm not talking about the ones in the Winnebego!"
Yogurt: "Use the schwartz."
Lonestar: "I can't I lost the ring!"
Yogurt: "The ring? I found that in a Crackerjack box."
Dark Helmet: "I hate it when my schwarts gets twisted!"
Dark Helmet (to Lone Star): "Say good-bye to your two best friends, and I don't mean your pals on the Winnebago!"
Lone Star (to Barf): "We're not just doing this for money...we're doing it for a SH*T-LOAD of money!"
Darth Helmet "found anything?"
first guy (combing the desert with a big comb) "nothing here sir"
Darth Helmet "you guys?"
second guy (also with a big comb) "not a thing"
Darth Helmet "how about you?"
third guy (black guy using a big hair pick) "we aint found SHIT!"
Dark Helmet: "Now, Lonestar, you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb."
Dark Helmet: "Say good-bye to your two best friends, and I don't mean your pals on the Winnebago!"
Helmet: "Who's he?"
Colonel: "An asshole sir."
Helmet: "I know that. What's his name??"
Dark Helmet: "Yogurt! I hate yogurt! Even with strawberries!"

Alec: "Vic, you turn that frown upside-down right now!" Vic: "I'll turn YOU upside-down right now!"

Leo: "Tiffany, sweetie! You remember Charlie, our driver." Tiffany: "Hello again, Mr. Cronin." Charlie(raspy voiced): "Hello. Hello, hello?" Leo: "Charlie, you remember Tiffany, don't you?" Charlie(raspy voiced): "Yes! Yes. Oatmeal, I forgot to add the water."

"The license plate is as follows: R-I-C-H. Uh, I think that spells 'RICH'."
"Please mister, this is not my fault. My brother Donato, he make me do this. Please, sir! Don't put me in jail with the Manson family."

Karen Boyer (Donna Dixon): You're not going to give me that crap about you dying today, are you? Emmett Fitz-Hume (Chevy Chase): No, no...not today.

Austin Milbarg to Dr. Boyer about the Russian Missle: "Do you know what that thing could do? Strip the paint off your house and give your family a permanent orange afro!"

Demi Moore to Rob Lowe: "You break my heart, but then again you break everyone's heart."

Do you believe in pre-marital sax ?

"Guys, can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em." "He's like smoking...I can only go without him for so long and then I gotta have a hit."

Kirby: I always thought we'd be friends forever. Kevin: Yeah, well forever got a lot shorter all of a sudden.

Alec: "You do realize you're being arrested for drunk driving?" Billy: "Drunk,definatly. I don't think you could call it driving, though."

I enjoy being afraid of Russia. It's a harmless fear, but it makes America feel better, Russia get an inflated sense of national worth from our paranoia. How's that?

Leslie to Kevin and Allan: "You were both the miricle of my life, but I need to try life without any miricles for once"

"Love is an illusion created by lawyer types like yourself to perpetuate another illusion called marriage to create the reality of divorcing and the illusionary need for divorse lawyers"

"She is the only evidence of God I have seen with the exception of the mysterious force that removes one sock from the dryer every time I do my laundry."

Billy: Drunk, definately, I don't know if you could call it driving.

"Wasted Love!! God, I just wish I could get it back."

E.E. - (after kiss) (after picture's taken) "Later dude"

"Are you still a Virgin?"

"Me? Ahh, you know... it ain't easy bein' me!!"

"I thought we'd be friends forever, forever suddenly got shorter didn't it?"

Kevin says, "Love's an illusion." Kirby replies, "It's the only illusion that counts, my friend."

Teddy: "Train dodge. Dig it!"

Teddy: "Oh, Billy! I wish we never boosted that car! Oh, Billy! I think I just turned my Fruit of the Looms into a fudge factory." Vern:"You think Mighty Mouse could beat up Superman?" Teddy:"What are you, cracked?" Vern:"Why not?! I saw the other day he was carrying five elephants in one hand!" Teddy: "You don't know nothin'. Mighty Mouse is a cartoon. Superman is a real guy. No way a cartoon could beat up a real guy."

Vern:What am I suppose to eat? Teddy:Why don't you cook your dick? Chris:It'd be a small meal.

Vince: I tell you how they're gonna find him: ten years from now some hunter's going to the woods taking a leak and wind up pissin' on his bones. Charlie: I bet you a thousand bucks they find him before that! Eyeball: I bet you two thousand dollars they don't! Charlie: Well asshole -- Jack: Hey what's the big deal? Who cares? Ace: Will you two just shut the fuck up. If either one of you assholes had two thousand dollars, I'd kill you both. Chris: Hey, at least now we know when the next train was due. Teddy: Man. That was the old-time train dodge. Too cool. Vern you were so scared you looked like the fat guy in Abbott and Costello the time he saw the mummy. Vern: I wasn't that scared! Others: Vern! Vern: No, really, I wasn't. Sincerely. Gordie: Okay. Then you won't mind if we check the seats of your Jockeys for Hershey-squirts, will ya? Vern: Oh screw. Chris: Vern, you better turn yours over. Vern: It is the way I'd like to do it. Chris: Fine. Vern: Oh man! You got any more, Gordie? Gordie: Sorry, Vern. Vern: It's not funny, what am I supposed to eat? Teddy: Why don't you eat your dick? It would be a small meal. Vern: Screw you guys I got it! Vern: Nothing like a smoke after meal. Teddy: Yeah. I cherish these moments.

Teddy to Vern: Is it me, or are you the world's biggest pussy?

"Oh, Gordie just screwed the pooch!"

Teddy: "Im gonna rip your head off and sh*t down your neck!!"

Vern: "But if a train comes, there's no where's to go." Teddy: "Sure there is. You just jump." Gordie: "Well, there's the (can't remember) bridge." Teddy: "Are you kidding? That's five miles from here! We walk five miles to the bridge that means we gotta walk five miles back. Forget it. I'm crossing. And while you candy-asses are dragging yourselves halfway across the state and back I'll be on the other side relaxing with my thoughts." Gordie: "Do you use your left or your right hand for that?" Teddy: "C'mon you guys! By the time we get there the kid won't even be dead anymore!" Teddy/Chris/Vern: "I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you I throw up." Gordie: "And then your mother goes around the corner and licks it up." Gordie/Chris: "JESUS!" (After the gun goes off) Gordie: "Suck my fat one, you cheap dimestore hood."

Vern:Oh great spit at the fat kid

"What are you gunna do? Shoot all of us?" "No, Ace, just you."

teddy: Hurry up, by the time we get there the kid won't even be dead anymore!

"That happens sometimes - friends come in and out of our lives like busboys in a restaurant."

teddy: what do you need a comb for you don't have any hair.

Teddy: I knock. Chris: You four-eyed pile of shit! Teddy: That pile of shit has a thousand eyes! What? What's so funny? Come on, I've got thirty, what have you got?

gordy: see ya chris:not if i see you first

"Oh Billy, I think I just turned my fruit of the looms into a fudge factory"
"Oh Billy! I think I just turned my fruit-of-the-looms into a fudge factory!"
Let's just say I stole the milk money, but the teacher stole it from me.
Junk guy: "All your fathers are gonna get a call from me!... except for the loony up in Tokas".
Teddy: My father stormed the beach at Normandy."
Junk guy: "Your fathers crazier than a house rat!"

if i could have one thing for the rest of my life: thats easy cherry flavored pezz.....

Chris: Hey, how do you know a Frenchman's been in your backyard? Teddy: Hey, I'm French, okay. Chris: Your garbage cans are empty and your dog's pregnant. Teddy: Didn't I just say I was French? Chris: I knock. Teddy: Shit. Chris: Twenty-nine. Teddy: Twenty-two. Gordie: Piss up a rope! Teddy: Gordie's out. Oh Gordie just bit the bag and stepped out the door!

"i ran all the way home just to say im sorry..." gordy,teddy and chris sang as vern tried to tell them about the dead body

"Suck my fat one, you cheap dime store hood."- said by Gordy to Ace. "Who ever told you you had a fat one, LaChance?"- Chris to Gordy. "Fattest one in four counties."- Gordy to Chris

Kirk: "Physician, heal thyself." McCoy: "Is that all you have to say? What did you think of my performance?" Kirk: "I'm not a drama critic."

Kirk: "You're suffering from the effects of a Vulcan mind-meld." McCoy: "That green-blooded son of a b****. That's his revenge for all the arguments he lost."

Spock: "What does it mean, 'exact change'"

Cab Driver: "Why don't you get out of the road, dumb ass?!?!" Kirk:"Well, DOUBLE dumb ass on you!"

"Luke... I am your father." -Dark Lord Darth Vader

obi-wan: "That boy is our last hope." yoda:"No, there is another."

(Han and Leia fell back onto a chair with Leia on Hans lap) Leia: "Let go." Han listening to something: "Shh." Leia: "Let go please!" Han: "Don't get so excited." Leia: "Believe me, Captain, being held by you is quite enough to get me exited." Han: "Calm down Your Highness." (with a grin) "We haven't time for anything else."

"Drink the juice, Shelby. Please drink the juice."

"You know what they say: 'If you don't have anything nice to say about someone, come sit by me!'"

Annelle: "Sammy Duane Desota, what IS this in my Frigidaire?" Sammy: "beer" Annelle: "well I don't care what you keep in yours but you will not keep liquor in mine." Sammy: "Jesus Christ Annelle." Annelle: "what did you say?" Sammy: "Christ Christ Christ" Annelle: "I think we should pray" Sammy: "Oh I'd rather eat dirt"

Marilyn: "Shelby was right...my hair does look like a brown football helmet!" Shelby: "Pink is my signature color." Clarie: "Looks like two pigs fightin' under a blanket."

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here." Shelby (after her insulin reaction in Truvy's)

"The wedding colors are blush and bashful." "Her colors are pink and pink." "BLUSH AND BASHFUL. Pink Is my signature color." "The church looks like it was hosed down with Pepto-bismol.

It's better than a bikini

"You know you worship the quicksand I walk upon"

"HERE! HIT WEEZA!!!!!!!!!"

Malin: "Ouisa, call your dog, he'll listen to you."

Ouisa:"Kill, Rhett, kill!"

" You know I love you more than my luggage."

"Luke I am your father...join the dark side, you knob!"

Bill Murray to the Troops prior to boot camp graduation: "We are the wretched refuse, our forefathers have been kicked out of every decent country in the world. But, we're American Soldiers!! We've been kickin' A$$ for 200 years!! We're 10 and 1!

Names Francis Soyer..I dont like anyone touchin my stuff and if you do.......i'll kill ya and I don't like anyone touchin me niether and if you do I'll kill ya

Sgt. Hulka: "Any of you suckholes wanna come up here and knock me off?" Bill Murray: "You can't leave. All the plants are gonna die." Frances Soyer: "Anybody calls me Frances, and I'll kill ya." Hulka: "Lighten up, Frances."

"thats the fact jack"

"My freinds back home used to call me 'Cruiser' 'cause I like fast cars and fast women." "They should have called you 'dork'."

Convicted? No, Never convicted...

"Lee Harvey, you are a madman! When you stole that cow...and your friend tried to make it with the cow....I wanna party with you, cowboy!"
You're a lean, mean fighting machine!
That's a fact, Jack!

No,we're not Homosexuals, but we are willing to learn Thats one hell of a recreational vehicle I wish I was a loofa Its time to party.... Italian Style

Go ahead. Make my day.

" this is my table. and these are my lobsters." "yea its a good base. good base. you gotta do these things in stages."

John Candy: "Now, if you'll excuse me, I forgot my Noczema...(goes upstairs and comes back down with his daughter)...and my daughter."
Daughter: "Daddy, I wet my bed."
John Candy: "No, you didn't. You wet THEIR bed."

Chainsaw: "Hey, Mr. Shoop! Wow, you in this class too?" Shoop: "Mm-mmm. I'm teaching it." Dave & Chainsaw: "No Way! (singing)PARTY ALL THE TIME, PARTY ALL THE TIME!" Shoop: "Alan Eakian?" Eakian: "Present, sir" Shoop: "3 brothers, 2 sisters, all straight-A students. What are you doing here?" Eakian: "I assume there was some sort of a baby mix-up at the hospital." Shoop: "Look, Gills is having a cow about our field trips. Unless you guys all pass that test, my job. . . Memorex. Any suggestions?" Denise: "Get yourself some want ads." Shoop: "I'd like to help. What can I do?" Chainsaw: "Give me your car." Dave: "And your house." Chainsaw: "And your dog." Shoop: "Forget it." Denise: Hey, Eakian. This party's getting weak. Do something wild, take all your clothes off." Eakian: Why, you want everyone to go home?" (both laugh) Eakian: "It's a simple renegotiation of our contract." Shoop: "Renegotiate? Who do ya think you are, teamsters?" Kevin: "Yeah, teamsters! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!" (class joins in chanting) Shoop: "I remember you. Where've you been?" Jerome(handing back his pass): "Bath room." Shoop: "For six weeks?" Jerome: "My zipper got stuck."

Where ya been all summer " My zipper was stuck "

Freddy Shoop: "Your teacher got arrested for giving alcohol to minors." Chainsaw: "You went to jail for us?" Freddy: "Yes, I went to jail...on roller skates."

Chainsaw: "I'm going to the library." Chainsaw: "I don't know anything!!! I don't know anything!!"

"I've been ... working out."

Zod: Come to me son of Jor-el kneel before Zod.

ursa[to zod]: i have powers beyond reason here!

"destroy superman,first i have fun"

"Oh goodie, Cheeto's in Albuquerque I can hardly wait!" "I'm sorry, you're going to call the kid 'Elliot'? You can't call the kid 'Elliot'. No! Elliot's the kind of kid who eats paste, you gotta give the kid a real name, a name like 'Nick'! Yeah, Nick's your buddy, Nick's the kind of guy who doesn't mind if you puke in his car...I'm sorry madam, vomit. Nick!" "I hope you fully appreciate the magnitude of your impending good fortune." "...yeah I always wanted to be an astronaut, you know, all the 'Tang' you can drink!"

Spontaneity has its time & its place.
"Thanks for the ride, I've been out here all day. noone wants to give a ride to a stranger. (with psychotic look on his face as his voice gets louder and louder)I mean, I could be some crazed psycho who would rip your heart out and eat it. Just for pleeeeeeasure....Why aren't we moving? Don't you want to give me a ride?"
"Me and my wife were having a fight."
"Then why did you pick me up? I'm leaving...and I think I'll take your wife."

"they must be from LA... a bow bow"