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Ten Criteria for the Perfect 80's Music Video, Groups Beginning with V

Compiled mostly by Chris Pyhtila with the help of Andy Pachmayer, Chris Burger, and Aaron Fynewever

Further commentary added by ChuckyG and various web visitors...

This page currently edited by: Rio Rhodes. Past editor: Rock 'n' Roll Fan

The Original Criteria

  1. At least one babe
  2. Poofy hair
  3. Torn clothing
  4. Cheesy keyboards
  5. At least one change of clothing
  6. Stage effects (smoke, lasers, etc.) or visual effects (artist jumping through a TV, disappearing, etc.)
  7. Wild instrumental or record scratch solo
  8. A storyline
  9. A cool car (although any kind of transportation is acceptable, like a plane or a car or a motorcycle)
  10. Sunglasses
Songs beginning with: [Index] [A] [B] [C] [D] [E] [F] [G] [H] [I] [J] [K] [L] [M] [N] [O] [P] [Q] [R] [S] [T] [U] [V] [W] [X] [Y] [Z] [misc]
Van Halen's, "Hot For Teacher"
  1. Babes? Oh yeah, all the teachers look like centerfold models.
  2. Poofy Hair? Yeah all the teachers as well as Diamond Dave himself and especially the bored blonde girl chewing gum sitting in class.
  3. Torn Clothing? Yes some of the band members sport torn workout gear
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Dont think so.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? A few as I recall: the band wears its spandex and leather to cuts where they are wearing red tuxedos.
  6. Stage Effects? Yes they turn the classroom to looking like a strip club.
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Eddie's guitar solo while walking down the tables in the school library. Great work from the virtuoso himself in his prime. Alex has a wild drum solo at the beginning of the song too.
  8. Storyline? The continuing story of the geek named "Waldo" and how VH changes school from a bore into a major party. They also show what happens to everyone after they graduate
  9. Cool Automobile? Oh yeah, there is a hot rod Dave peels out and drives away in at the end of the video.
  10. Sunglasses? Yes all band members wear shades.
Submitted by: Jeff
Van Halen's, "Hot For Teacher "
  1. Babes? Hot teacher that is The point of the song.
  2. Poofy Hair? 80's metal need i say more
  3. Torn Clothing? Once again 80's metal need i say more
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? no
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? 80's metal need i say more
  6. Stage Effects? nope
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Van Halen guitar great solos in library
  8. Storyline? He's hot for teacher
  9. Cool Automobile? Totally cool car at the end
  10. Sunglasses? Of course
Submitted by: Ubbermann
Van Halen's, "Jump"
  1. Babes? Nope. Unless you count David Lee Roth.
  2. Poofy Hair? This is Van Halen, after all. The band that started all the '80s hair bands.
  3. Torn Clothing? Yes! Ripped shirts, pants etc. David Lee Roth still dresses like this!
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Why should I even have to answer??? That's the whole point of "Jump"!
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? I don't think the shooting took that long.
  6. Stage Effects? Yes this is DLR Van Halen after all. Watch for the cheesy(but cooool!) zoom when DLR jumps!
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? DUH! Eddie Van Halen is playing it, people! Not just a wild EVH guitar solo, but THE '80s keyboard solo!
  8. Storyline? Errrr..... not in the video, but in the song.
  9. Cool Automobile? No again, but the ULTIMATE '80s guitar!
  10. Sunglasses? Hmmm.... Alex Van Halen usually wears them.
Submitted by:
Van Halen's, "Hot For Teacher"
  1. Babes? THE "TEACHER"! And the other "teacher", and the other "teacher"....
  2. Poofy Hair? Practically every human being in this video.
  3. Torn Clothing? Not just torn clothing, but clothing being torn off!
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Not on this song, but I think the previous keyboard-fest, "Jump" and THREE guitar solos make up for it.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Everyone's changing clothes in this video. The band, the "teachers", the kids...
  6. Stage Effects? Eddie walking down the library table while doing the solo into the camera, bright lights, dancing girls...
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Eddie Van Halen's THREE sizzling guitar solos, especially the one when he walks down a 20 foot table and plays at the same time.
  8. Storyline? At first, Waldo doesn't want to go to school. Then he meets the "teacher", and now, "No one's quite sure what became of Waldo after graduation."
  9. Cool Automobile? Class Dismissed!, and the kids zoom off with David Lee Roth in a killer convertible!
  10. Sunglasses? Most everybody in this video has them on at one time, but David Lee Roth definitely looks coolest in them.
Submitted by:
Songs beginning with: [Index] [A] [B] [C] [D] [E] [F] [G] [H] [I] [J] [K] [L] [M] [N] [O] [P] [Q] [R] [S] [T] [U] [V] [W] [X] [Y] [Z] [misc]
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